WTF?????

Roughly once a week, I get an email like this one in my inbox:

spam

Normally I don’t even open them — I just hit the “SPAM” button on gmail and move on. But today, curiosity tapped me on the shoulder and I opened this little gem, and thought… WHAT. THE. F**K?!?

Where do these emails come from?

What’s their purpose?

Is it some kind of twisted market research tactic?

Is it just cyber-trash?

Does ANYBODY actually respond to these? They must, right? Or they would cease to continue?

What’s the CTR on these, I wonder? Higher than normal? Lower?

Seriously, folks…. WTF???!!!!?

Now that Curiosity had me going, I decided to dig through my Spam folder to see what other treasures I might find. I found plenty.

First there was this one, which bestowed upon me the good news that some random dead guy left me $30,100,000. Not too shabby.

spam2

And this one, in which a clever businessman from Hong Kong hand-picked me to launder a mere $10.6M in exchange for a piece of the action:

spam3

Nice!

Next, we have a dying woman in the Netherlands who wishes to leave me $1,500,000 to help widows and orphans—a career change I wasn’t planning on, but am now reconsidering since it is clearly quite lucrative. I also enjoy that she tells me point blank, “Do take this email as a contribution to fake (Spam)” right in the opening paragraph. Priceless!

spam4

I could go on all day with these. My Spam folder is littered with them… right alongside irresistible offers like “Lose Weight Quickly & Naturally!”, “Stay in Your Domicile to Earn 20grand in 30days”, and—my favorite—”Flush out excess pounds from your colon!”

Yes, these are actual subject lines, folks.

Which brings me back to my original question: WTF???

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